pre-schooler anger

I have a 5-year-old teenager. Yup. Thought it was a phase, but I have a feeling phases don't last years... Unless it's adolescence!

Sebastian spends most of his days complaining, whining, crying, calling me mean, telling me to go away, and giving me dirty looks. The catalysts? Telling him it's bedtime, it's mealtime, it's time to go to school, it's time to go home, it's time to go out and play, it's Lucas's turn to choose the book first, Lucas won the race this time, no, it's not your turn again. The list goes on. I've tried all the tricks: countdown time (i.e., ten minutes to bedtime! the logic being that it doesn't just pop up on him out of nowhere!); choices (i.e., we are going to play outside today - do you want to take your bike or go for a walk by the lake? the logic being he's in control); reasoning with him (i.e., explaining WHY we have to eat, and sleep, and put our running shoes on the day they have gym at pre-K); setting alarms (i.e., "when the alarm goes off, it means we have to put our jackets on..." the logic being that he doesn't feel like mommy is controlling everything); routine (i.e., our days don't change that much on a daily basis, apparently children thrive on that). And it often ends up with my losing my sh** and doing precisely what my mother used to do: guilt him or shame him or force him with threats to do what he needs to do.

What is in store for me when the hormones start flowing?